As I was standing in the center of the square taking photos of the entryway to spring festival, I was struck by the timeliness of the man hauling his wagon who was crossing paths with the girl flying her kite. I did not pull out my phone to take their picture, they simply walked into the frame. It was as if they were posing, inviting me to ask the question, “what are you carrying?”
I stood there watching him, the elderly man, who appeared to have the weight of his years in addition to the weight of his wagon being hauled by his slender and aging body. I wondered, what was he thinking? How was he feeling? What was his experience like working on one of the few days in the year that most people have off? Where was his family? At what point did he take that coat off and tie it to his wagon? Did he notice the young girl flying her kite? What memories did he have of flying a kite as a kid on New Year’s Day? I wonder, what is he carrying?
I stood there watching the young girl flying her kite on a day people typically expect to be full of fun and celebration. I wondered what was she thinking? How was she feeling? What was causing her to have no semblance of joy or happiness on her face? Was this her first time flying a kite? What were her struggles and triumphs in getting the kite to take flight? What were her holiday traditions? Did she notice the old man hauling his wagon? What considerations did she have about working as an aging woman on New Year’s Day? I wonder, what is she carrying?
Then, as the man hauling his wagon and the girl flying her kite disappeared from sight, I zoom into the crowd, looking at person after person. I notice that everyone is facing forward. Everyone is looking ahead. Everyone is looking into the gateway of 2016. Everyone is looking into the future. Everyone, except a man wearing his lucky red sweater, standing still, alone, in the middle of the square looking pensively, down at the ground. I wonder, what is he thinking? How is he feeling? Why is he not looking forward? What is he looking back on? What is in his future that he is afraid of? What is in his past that he is holding on to? Did he notice the man hauling his wagon? The girl flying her kite? I wonder, what is he carrying?
I stood there, considering each persons story. Reflecting on how each path intersects, the timeliness of each encounter and the impermanence of those fleeting moments. I wonder, did they notice me? Did they wonder? What was I thinking? How was I feeling? How was it being here from out-of-town, experiencing China for the new year celebration? Where was my family? What were holiday’s like in my home country? Why was I standing so far away, hesitant to walk through the gateway into 2016? What was I waiting for? Did I notice them? What am I carrying?
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As we come upon celebration of the Lunar New Year of 2021, I re-read and reflect on my experience of Spring Festival while living in Guangzhou, China. The questions that I pondered while looking at the people, in the square, whom were looking ahead, into 2016 seem so relevant and timely now. As I sit here I consider;
the elderly man with the wagon
the little girl with the kite
the man standing alone, wearing the lucky red sweater and the pensive look
…and I wonder,
What are they thinking? What are they feeling? Are they standing at the gateway of 2021? Weight of the wagon and the world on his back? Kite flying high from her hand? His eyes gazing down at the ground? What are they carrying?
…and… I consider myself, pandemic socially distanced , recovering from a major operation…
Am I still standing afar, hesitant to step through the gateway of 2021? Am eager to confidently move ahead? What am I waiting for? What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What am I carrying?